From: Pastor Ed [mailto:pastored@spiritofjoy.us]
Sent: Tuesday, April 21, 2015 8:00 PM
Subject: Apr 22 - Song of Solomon 8:6
Keep me near you like
a seal you wear over your heart,
like a signet ring you wear on your hand.
Love is as strong as death.
Passion is as strong as the grave.
Its sparks become a flame,
and it grows to become a great fire!
Song of Solomon 8:6
ERV
Let me set the scene: A man walks into a bar.
I know. I know. It sounds like the beginning of a bad joke, right?
Well, it is.
The bad joke that I’m about to tell occurs whenever some man (or woman) walks into a bar and slides off their wedding ring as they enter.
Cognitively, I understand why people do this. It’s false advertising. The billboard on their empty-left-ring-finger is clear. It says, “I’m available.”
Covenantally, however, I don’t understand this act at all.
Think about what happens when we exchange rings before the altar. With a slightly trembling hand, I once put a delicate ring on my bride’s finger, saying, “I give you this ring as a sign of my love and faithfulness.”
Wait. Read that again.
Where is the ring that’s the sign of my fidelity? It’s on her hand. She – not me – is wearing my sign. Therefore, taking off the ring on my finger, releases her … not me. Indeed, if I were to start advertising that I’m available, I’d have to try to pry the ring from her finger. (And that’s not happening!)
A Sign of your Covenant
This week, we’re talking about the covenantal nature of marriage. Yesterday, you heard that the old Hebrew understanding of cutting a covenant meant cutting a bull in half … and then walking ceremonially through the blood and entrails. The covenant-keeper was saying, “The day I quit fighting for this covenant – the day I quit fighting for my marriage – go ahead and cut me in half!”
With this in mind, think for a moment about what happens when people divorce. Too often the one who asks for the divorce is ready to do what? – “Move on to a better life.” But at the altar, moving-on-if-I-ever-feel-like-it wasn’t the pledge. My pledge was, “I’d rather be cut in half than give up.”
And guess what … our wife (or husband) wears the sign of that covenant on their finger. Meaning that I can’t take it off … especially at my convenience.
Yes, I know, we live in a broken world. And because of that, the Bible – including the sayings of Jesus himself – makes allowances for divorce. Infidelity is the clearest. And how about abuse? Abuse – whether verbal, physical, or emotional – has already shattered the sanctity of that one-flesh union.
As a pastor, I frequently counsel people who’ve been abandoned. They don’t “believe in” divorce. They’re often willing to keep working at it, to keep fighting. But how do you keep covenant when the other person has totally “moved on”? “It’s like trying to clap,” I say, “with just one hand. All you’re doing is waving at the air.”
I say this because I want you to know that I know that life is hard. Divorce happens … even to very nice people. But let’s focus on the rule rather than the exception, the hope rather than the curse. Let’s focus on the marriage that you’re in (or perhaps are pointing to). Let’s focus indeed on the ring that’s on the finger of your beloved. They’re wearing the sign of your covenant.
That’s your covenant. You are giving yourself to them. That’s the message that they wear everyday on their finger. It is, indeed, your pledge. You are saying, “I’d rather be cut in half than to ever quit fighting for this marriage. I give myself totally to thee.”
Question: Start looking at the ring on the hand of your beloved – whether they’re holding your hand in love or waving it at you in anger. Recall that once you picked out that ring for them in hope and love. That ring that they wear is your promise. And to begin restoring that love and hope, perhaps you need to start praying, “God, help me be worthy of the promise that my beloved is wearing”?
In Christ’s Love,
a guy who’s promise
sparkles in the sunlight
(it’s a pretty nice diamond
on my girl’s finger)
No comments:
Post a Comment