Therefore a man
… clings to his wife,
and they become one flesh.
Genesis 2:24
NRSV
Notice what this verse doesn’t say. It doesn’t say that the two shall become one heart. It doesn’t say that they shall become one mind. It says one flesh. One body.
Marriage is sexual.
It is intimate. The two are designed to fit together as one.
Sex is tender. Sex is exciting. Sex is fun. And it was designed by God to be that way! God invented two bodies to fit together. Intimately. And God invented the chemicals released during love-making. Yes, say it with me: “God invented sex! Our Lord is not a prude!”
Look at some of the wonderful bodily chemicals that thrill us during love-making …
· Norepinephrine generates energy, excitement, and exhilaration. It helps us focus, single-mindedly on our beloved as the most important person in our world.
· Oxytocin, released at climax, is the body’s natural tranquilizer. It – and sex – reduces stress.
· Serotonin has the many of same stress-relieving effects as Oxytocin … plus one more. Serotonin is the key ingredient in many anti-depressants; thus, sex is buoys our spirit!
· How about testosterone? (And no, it’s not just for men!) Testosterone is the hormone of desire – sexual desire – in both men and women. But guys, let’s be honest … for us sex and our hormones play an even more central role. This sexual hormone triggers a positive outlook and sense of well-being.
Those are all delightful chemical, but most important sexual chemical of all is dopamine. When elevated, as during sex, this chemical focuses our attention.
Do you see, therefore, its purpose in marriage? The dopamine of sex is designed to focus us intently on our spouse. Indeed, it’s designed to do this to the exclusion of all others! Of everything else!
Read that again: Sex focuses two people on one other. Totally!
In other words, this is how sex was designed by God to unite husband and wife together passionately and purposefully. This is how sex was designed to make us one flesh.
That’s God’s design! And we need to talk more about that! Why? Because it’s powerful!
And because sex is powerful, this gift often gets misused. Our goal in coming days and devotions will be to help us celebrate God’s grand design for sex … and eliminate the misuses which actually make sex and marriage worse.
Question of the Day: See below
In Christ’s Love,
a guy, which means
… well, you know
Question of the Day
· Getting Married: I’m not naïve. In our modern world, most of you are probably not perfectly chaste. But I would suggest that you note the order of God’s plan in today’s verse: When “the man clings to his wife [that’s when they] become one flesh.” Yes, sex can be physically exhilarating whether you’re married or not. But rushing God’s order will lessen the eventual gift. Indeed, you’re trading a deeper satisfaction for the next fifty years for a few moments of fun today. I don’t expect you to fully understand this until you back up, stop “fooling around,” and choose to wait, trusting that God has a plan to bring you a much greater joy and unity than you’re experiencing now.
· Newlyweds: Go celebrate! And while you do, ask this question: “What is married sex teaching me about being one with another?!”
· Married: Go celebrate! And while you do, ask this question: “What is our sexuality continually teaching us about being one with another?!”
· Not Married: This is a hard topic, isn’t it? To hear that there’s a powerful, physical gift and blessed, relational unity … and not be part of it. Here’s the good news: Jesus himself was single and celibate. The Apostle Paul celebrated the single estate as freeing us to unite more fully with God. In fact, historically, there has been almost an insistence upon celibacy as a path to spiritual intimacy. Therefore, as you may be lamenting one loss (the intimacy of marriage) is it possible for you to celebrate a potential gain – greater intimacy with God?!
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