Oct 21 - Matthew 5:31-32

Jesus said,

“It was also said,

‘Whoever divorces his wife,

let him give her a certificate of divorce.’

But I say to you that anyone

who divorces his wife,

except on the ground of unchastity,

causes her to commit adultery;

and whoever marries a

divorced woman commits adultery."

Matthew 5:31-32

When we were in Israel, the Beduin lifestyle was explained to us.

The Beduins are a nomadic group of Middle Eastern shepherds, and a typical Beduin man has three wives. Hmmm.

But don’t worry about the poor guy. If he gets tired of one, all he has to do is (something like) say "I divorce you" three times. Instantly the marriage is over (and a new bride can be brought into the tent).

Interestingly, many modern Americans are treating marriage only slightly more seriously.

The modern focus of marriage is on "me, myself, and I." And if you are making me, myself, and I happy, then we should stay married. But if me, myself, and I find something more satisfying, the principle of self-fulfillment demands that me, myself, and I should seek out a new soulmate to -- in a more satisfying way -- fulfill my heart (or at least tickle my loins ... as the case often is).

Fortunately, the Biblical picture of marriage does not follow the paradigm of me, myself, and I. It follows instead the shape and paradigm of the cross. Though directed originally at the husband, I believe both husbands and wives are called to "love your [spouse] as Christ loved the church."

In other words, the heart of marriage is sacrificial love ... not selfish desires.

It's about "what can I do for you" ... not "what can you do for me."

Yes, some spouses will inevitably try to take advantage of that ... but most will respond with joy and will reciprocate with wholehearted service for you too (when Jesus' sacrificial model of the two becoming one is joyfully followed).

Wait ... let's try that last thought again: Yes, some spouses will inevitably try to take advantage of the other person's sacrificial love ... but that's why a Christian marriage is not just between two people. That's why Christian marriage includes three -- you, me, and Jesus. If Christ is the focal point and the goal -- instead of "me first" or even "we two" -- then his love will transform us both.

·       We'll adopt his priorities.

·       We'll learn his forgiveness.

·       We seek to serve rather than be served.

·       We'll discover the power to begin putting sin, carnality, and selfish desires behind us.

·       We will see our spouse through Christ's eyes -- meaning, we will see with renewed wonder.

·       We will begin to truly live.

Jesus' sharpened older teachings on divorce -- no quick and random dismissals like the Beduins are allowed. Rather, he taught us that marriage is designed to not only protect marriage ... but to reveal our own weaknesses. If we try to do marriage on our own, we’ll eventually fail and fall. We will make a hopeless mess of things. Therefore, we need a Savior! Not only to save and transform us eternally ... but to save and transform our marriages day-by-day!

In Christ's Love,

a guy who is an awesome husband

(Ha! Not because of what I can do,

but because of the Awesome One

who makes me way better than just me)